I must admit it's not the nicest feeling. There is a difference between feeling and being alone. As a matter of fact, I am an introvert and I love being alone - I love having alone time, it's something that I need because being surrounded by people sometimes can really drain me. But feeling alone? God, I hate that feeling.
I believe it is one of the most ugliest feelings a person can ever experience. That saying, you can categorize the feeling of loneliness under depression and I know what depression is, cause someone whom I'm very close to suffers from it. It's really hard knowing that this person will feel lonely no matter what you say. Words can only go so far, but I guess it's the actions that count more, right?
Absolutely.
To make it pretty clear, I really do love making people happy but it's a challenge sometimes to cheer them up when they've hit rock bottom. How are you supposed to react when someone just breaks down in front of you? What do you do if you hear one of your closest friends crying on the phone to you? What do you say? It's really difficult, and sometimes, I'm afraid that what I've done to support the people I truly care about hasn't been enough.
To be honest, I set high expectations on myself especially when it comes to my family and my closest friends. I feel like I have the responsibility of taking care of them because it's not cause I feel obliged to, but because I want to. When I care, I fucking mean it.
It's sometimes really painful to care too much because sometimes, it affects me too. I know this is extremely corny, but if someone tells me their problems, I carry them as my problems as well. I feel like it's my responsibility to carry them with me so their burden becomes my burden as well. But in all honesty, I do it because it's out of love and respect and those are the two qualities I'm not afraid to admit that I have.
Otherwise, statistically speaking, I think there are billions of people out there that are unfortunate in having to deal with their problems on their own, and that fucking sucks. What would life be like if you were alone? How would you even cope with life? I think it would be fucking torture if you had to deal with your problems on your own, especially with no support network to turn to when things go to shit.
I guess loneliness is and will be a feeling that "makes the world go round" because I'm sure all of you have felt it before. It's not the best feeling and it can make you feel like shit but I just want you to know that a lonely person just wants to be heard. A lonely person doesn't like being ignored and they are the type that needs to be looked after and cared for. They would be too stubborn to seek help cause if they do, they would think of it as selfish thing to do.
To anyone that is reading this, regardless of who you are, I hope that if you ever do experience the feeling of loneliness just know that someone out there does care for you. I know you've probably heard this before, but you've got to remember that your problems shouldn't be dealt with on your own. Life isn't easy. In fact, it's challenging but if you look around you, there are people that mean a hell of a lot to you, and you wouldn't be here if it weren't for them helping you cope with certain things in your life.
I am honestly grateful for having an amazing set of genuine friends that I can count on for life, I'm also grateful for the people who have shown any sense of care and compassion when I was going through a hard time in my life. I just want to say, thank you for doing that because without you all, I wouldn't have made through a lot of things if it weren't for your kindness, strength, compassion and a listening ear. So thank you.
"And if you’re feeling alone, know that the world can be a lonely place but it would be lonelier without you in it." - Hayley Williams
